Leadership is Hard as Hell: Competence is Your Best Asset

You know what no one tells you about leadership? It’s hard as hell.

I’m not talking about those glossy “just delegate and disappear” fantasies sold by the scale sharks.

No, real leadership means having the guts to handle the messy stuff—delegation, tough feedback, and giving up your obsession with control.

It’s not about stepping away and sipping piña coladas; it’s about rolling up your sleeves and doing the work. Spoiler alert: being a great leader isn’t about perfection; it’s about competence. And if you don’t have that nailed down, your team will feel it—and so will your bottom line.

In this episode of Confessions of a Micro Agency Owner, we’re getting into why leadership isn’t the easy, breezy dream it’s sold as and why competence as a leader is your best asset.

Today, I’m talking about one of the biggest challenges for micro agency owners: leadership. Not just the fluffy visionary leadership you read about but the real leadership that impacts how your team works, how your micro agency functions, and how you survive as a leader of a small and mighty team. 

Competence is a pillar of the Micro Agency Momentum Model. Without solid leadership skills, your micro agency will struggle, and it’s typically one of the most complex challenges you’ll face when building your team and business.

You know how to do the client work, but competence in the context of leadership, though? That’s a whole different beast.

Your leadership competence separates a functioning, thriving agency from a chaotic mess where every decision and every problem is a “you” problem

Why Competence Matters

Competence means you’re not just running around putting out fires—you’ve built systems that prevent the fires from happening in the first place. It’s about how well you lead, manage, and grow your team over time.

For a micro agency owner, competence looks like: 

• Knowing how to delegate effectively ensures you’re not stuck in every detail.
• Giving honest feedback that helps your team improve without sugarcoating or causing unnecessary drama.
• Having uncomfortable but necessary conversations when things go sideways.
• Managing your time, energy, and focus so you’re steering the ship, not sinking.

Competence creates trust within your team—trust in you as their leader, in the process and in themselves. When your team knows you have your act together, they work better. It’s that simple.

Unfortunately, if you’re lacking in this area, it shows. It shows in the time it takes to make decisions, the number of fires you need to put out, and the stress levels across your entire team.

If you find that things are slipping through the cracks, chances are you have a competence gap to address, and I want to reinforce that this is entirely normal.

Going from being a solo business owner to a true leader takes time, like anything else you do in your business. You need to build the required skills.

Scale Shark Leadership: Delegate and Disappear

Before we discuss building leadership skills, it’s time for a rant.

Let’s talk about the scale sharks selling you the dream of “build a team, step away, and sip piña coladas while your agency runs itself.” Sound familiar? Yeah, that fantasy where you just “lead from the beach” or whatever nonsense they’re pushing now.

That entire idea is laughable. They’re skipping to the good part and never actually tell you true leadership isn’t just about delegating and disappearing. It’s not about hiring a few people and expecting them to magically make everything happen while you peace out.

To get to the point where your team can operate without you, you need to invest time into training, giving feedback, holding people accountable, and leading by example. You have to be IN IT before you can step back from it.

But the scale sharks? They’ll have you believe you can skip over all that. Just hire, disappear, and everything will fall into place. Except that’s not how it works.

Building a high-functioning team requires developing leadership skills, such as handling difficult conversations, creating a culture of trust, and ensuring your team feels supported and empowered.

You don’t just get to clock out once you have a team. Leadership is ongoing. If you’re unwilling to put in the effort, you’re setting yourself (and your team) up for failure.

The piña colada dream only works if you’ve laid the groundwork for a solid team that can thrive without constant hand-holding. And that takes real leadership, not the “delegate and disappear” BS the scale sharks teach. 

I know this isn’t glamorous, but it’s the truth. Anyone selling you the idea that an agency will allow you to scale rapidly and not be involved is either clueless, a scammer, or potentially both.

Must-Have Leadership Skills for Micro Agency Owners

Now that we all agree that you need to be involved and engaged as the leader of your micro agency, let’s discuss what you should focus on to become a more competent leader.

Delegation

First up: delegation. Now, I know what you’ve heard—“Just delegate everything, and your team will handle it.” But if you don’t know how to delegate the right things to the right people, you’re not leading.

Delegation is not dumping tasks on someone and hoping for the best. It’s about assigning ownership, not just ticking boxes. I know letting go of control is tough, especially when this is your baby and you’ve been hands-on since day one.

Real delegation means empowering your team to take responsibility and make decisions. When done right, it frees up your time and builds a team that’s competent, confident, and able to deliver without you hovering over them.

To build your delegation skills, you need to start by identifying your team’s strengths, weaknesses, and preferences so you can assign the right tasks to the right people. Then, start delegating smaller, low-risk assignments to build trust gradually.

It’s crucial to set clear expectations from the outset—be explicit about the outcomes you want, the deadlines, and any specific guidelines they need to follow. Providing the necessary resources and support is also key; ensure your team has everything they need to complete the task effectively, whether it’s tools, time, or training.

If you’re struggling with delegating any specific projects or types of work, go back to the start, as this is an ongoing process as a leader.

The other critical element to delegation is communication and feedback. Establish a feedback loop where your team feels comfortable approaching you with questions or when they hit obstacles. This ongoing communication allows you to guide them without slipping into micromanagement.

After a task is completed, take time to review and reflect on the process with your team. (No, it’s not faster to just do it yourself, stop that!) Discuss what went well and what could be improved. This helps refine your delegation approach and fosters growth and learning within your team.

Finally, let go of the need for perfection. Understand that your team might approach tasks differently than you would, and that’s okay. As long as the result meets the standards and objectives, the process they use to get there is part of their learning and development.

Feedback and Difficult Conversations

Developing the ability to provide feedback and handle difficult conversations is one of the most crucial skills for any leader—yet it’s often the most avoided.

Nobody enjoys delivering tough feedback or having uncomfortable conversations, but avoiding them only leads to a buildup of unresolved issues that can spiral out of control.

Stop seeing feedback as negative and see it as an opportunity for growth—for you and your team. Giving constructive feedback early, before minor problems become massive obstacles, helps maintain a culture of transparency and continuous improvement in your micro agency.

If you’re unsure where to start or know you need to work on this, start by practicing directness. Be clear about what needs to change and why without sugarcoating or beating around the bush.

Being direct doesn’t mean being harsh—there’s a balance to strike between clarity and compassion. Make sure you frame feedback in a solution-oriented rather than purely critical way. It’s not about the person but the process or the end product you create for a client.

As much as possible, encourage a two-way conversation by asking for your team’s perspective and being open to discussing how they can improve (or how the process can improve!).

The more regularly you engage in these conversations, the more you build a culture where feedback is normalized, making it easier for everyone to course-correct without drama.

Avoiding difficult conversations doesn’t make the problems disappear; it only allows them to fester, leading to bigger problems. Dealing with issues head-on and early shows your team that you’re paying attention, that you care about their growth, and that you’re committed to maintaining high standards.

Honestly, strong leaders don’t shy away from tough conversations—they do what needs to be done, even if it’s uncomfortable. Keep in mind that if you’re unwilling to give feedback regularly, it’s that much harder to address bigger problems related to missed deadlines, client feedback or even poor performance.

Let Your Team Lead

Micromanagement is the fastest way to crush morale and productivity. When you constantly hover over your team, questioning every decision and needing to approve every little move, you’re not just wasting your time—you’re stifling theirs.

Your team stops taking the initiative because they know you’ll just step in and make the final call. They’ll wait for your approval on every decision, slowing everything down and preventing them from fully stepping into their roles.

In the end, this doesn’t just frustrate your team; you become an obstacle. If your team is stuck waiting for your say-so on every move, they can’t deliver their best work, and you’re missing out on the full value they could bring to your micro agency.

I will confess this is hard for most of us, myself included. While it’s connected to delegation, it’s about more than passing off work for your team to do.

Over time, what you want to aim for is training your team in a way that sets a clear vision for the outcome and gives them the autonomy to figure out how to get there. This means focusing on what needs to be done and why, not how they should do it. Define the goals, set clear expectations, and provide any resources or guidance they need upfront.

The goal is to go beyond delegation and have them take ownership of their work. It’s one thing for them to execute a task and another to be fully invested and make decisions related to that project or client.

If you want your team to be accountable and more proactive, you need to foster an environment that allows them to do so. This means giving them space to figure it out and make adjustments. You’re not there to jump in but to provide feedback and encouragement as needed.

You need to learn to curb the urge to get involved. Ask yourself if it’s truly necessary. Is there a real issue that requires your intervention, or are you stepping in out of habit or fear?

Developing self-awareness about your micromanaging tendencies is key, especially if you constantly feel overwhelmed by everything you need to do and wish your team would do a better job of supporting you and your clients.

Enter this episode’s confession. Learning to do this has been a major challenge for me, as I like things done my way and am bringing all my type-A+ tendencies to the table. I would complain to my then-business partner in the agency about how I felt like I had to do things on my own because “no one could do it like me,” and she would correctly point out that no one could do it like me because I wouldn’t let them even try.

Tough love for sure, but I know for some of you listening, this is your exact situation. You’re irritated and frustrated and think, “Why am I paying people but still have to do all the work?”. 

The reality is that you’re your own worst enemy. You need to be willing to give up control if you’re ever not going to be the one holding all the pieces.

And for anyone who’s reached this point and thinks they’ve handled all of these things, I strongly encourage you to recognize that there’s always room for improvement. Your leadership skills are a constant work in progress, and you cannot just check them all off, as every situation and stage of your business is different.

These are just some of the three leadership skills you require as a micro agency owner. There are plenty more, but there’s only so much time in every podcast episode, so I wanted to hit these highlights. In upcoming episodes, we’ll explore others such as strategic thinking, emotional intelligence, decision-making, conflict resolution, adaptability and coaching.

From Perfection to Progress: Focus on Building Your Competence as a Leader

In short, leadership is hard as hell.  It’s an ongoing, evolving process. You’re going to mess up, face hard conversations, and wrestle with control issues.

As cheesy as it may sound, every challenge you face is an opportunity to grow. The sooner you let go of perfection and focus on your leadership skills the more you’ll see your micro agency thrive.

Being a good leader isn’t about having all the answers; it’s about creating an environment where your team can succeed and you can take a much-needed break or vacation. Your leadership should have you setting things up so that not everything depends on you. 

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, like the weight of every decision falls on you, it’s time to assess your leadership skills and make adjustments. Whether it’s improving how you delegate, managing your own micromanaging tendencies, or getting more comfortable with difficult conversations, there’s always room to improve.

And remember, the goal isn’t to step away completely—it’s to build a team and micro agency that can function without your constant intervention while still feeling your presence as the leader. It’s hard as hell, but it’s worth it.